Friday, August 21, 2009

The Manny Tapes

If you don’t know where the OFF switches on a kid’s toys are, you’re fucked. Surrounded by trucks and Sesame Street shit and play pianos that are constantly going off as he’s whacking at them, your only salvation is when you’ve had enough you can simply flip a switch and the noise will stop, much to the kid’s oblivion. But right now his large, plastic Tigger airplane is going off like an alarm, “whoo-hoo-hoo!”s mixed with air traffic radio bleeps and, for some unknown reason, “Camptown Races”…just like in any airplane, I reckon…and I cannot find the off switch or where the batteries are.

TIP: always know how quickly the batteries can be taken out!!!!!!!!! 

And it looks like this is the toy he wants to play with for the rest of the morning. My mind is slipping into my neck and I’m seriously about to walk out into the nice, quiet street and lay my head down.

"Hahahaha!! Well guess what Xmastime, I wish I could turn your sissy crying off, you fucking pussy!"

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